JUST IN: UK Schools Ban Physical Contact, Including Hugging

Campus Gist And News Uk
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Two schools in the UK have decided actions such as holding hands and hugging are a threat to security (or something) and have been swinging their banhammer accordingly.

The schools, in the south of England, have told parents that the kids are no longer allowed to participate in ‘any aggressive contact’ including ‘hugging, holding hands, slapping someone, etc.’ OK, slapping we can understand, but ‘aggressive hand-holding?’‘This is in order to keep your child safe.

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If your child is touching somebody else, whether they are consenting or not, anything could happen,’ said one of the schools in a letter to parents.

As well as keeping students ‘safe,’ the move also ‘prevents romantic relationships,’ while at the same time promoting current favorite thing, ‘inclusion.’ Don’t worry, we’re baffled too.

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